Couples facing divorce may benefit from working with a mediator to settle their differences outside of court. Divorce mediators guide partners in reaching amicable agreements, helping to ease the process. In this guide, we discuss the role of a divorce mediator, along with the steps and expectations involved in mediation.

What Does a Divorce Mediator Do?

A divorce mediator is a neutral party that listens to both spouses’ sides. This professional does not give legal advice or make decisions for the couple. Rather, a divorce mediator serves as a facilitator to help partners navigate their separation and determine what works best for their situation.

As a neutral third party, the divorce mediator guides discussions about child custody, child support, property division, and post-separation support. Other issues relevant to divorcing couples, like alimony and attorney fees, are covered during the course of mediation, whether over a few hours or a few days.

In Illinois, a divorce mediator is not required to be an attorney. But they complete extensive training in alternative dispute resolution and family mediation. In order to remain qualified, the professional must follow a code of ethics and complete six hours of continuing education each year.

What Happens During Divorce Mediation: Step-by-Step Breakdown

1. Maintains Neutrality Between Both Spouses

Neutrality is the hallmark of divorce mediation. The mediator does not advocate for one partner over the other. Instead, they focus on helping the spouses find a fair and equitable solution. Their impartiality is crucial to fostering trust and ensuring both partners feel comfortable voicing their concerns.

2. Encourages Open and Productive Communication

The divorce mediator helps partners understand the practical aspects of divorce. They create a safe space that encourages the spouses to openly discuss their needs and concerns. Divorce mediators ensure both parties are heard by clarifying issues and managing conflicts.

Mediation sessions may be held in an informal office setting. With today’s advanced technology, however, mediation can take place online. Remote mediation may be conducted on common platforms, such as Zoom. These video conferencing sessions allow face-to-face interactions between partners.

3. Guides Couples Toward Fair Settlements

Divorcing couples do not need to reach a mediation agreement. However, they are required to remain involved in the settlement process. Divorce mediators help spouses explore their options and develop solutions with the intent to reach a mutually agreeable settlement.

4. Prioritizes the Best Interests of Children

If children are involved, the divorce mediator prioritizes their well-being. The professional assists the parents in finding arrangements that fulfill the children’s needs. In order to gain a greater understanding, the mediator may ask the children what they want to happen after the divorce.

The mediator then passes on the children’s wants and needs, helping the parents make decisions that factor in their feelings and wishes. Parents who are wrapped up in arguments neglect to hear their children’s voices. But mediation can be a powerful tool to ensure they are heard.

5. Prepares and Drafts the Settlement Agreement

Couples may reach a settlement during mediation. The divorce mediator then drafts a legally binding mediated settlement agreement. The spouses sign the written agreement, which may be a simple contract that outlines the terms of the settlement. A more formal, detailed contract is signed later.

When Is Divorce Mediation Not the Right Choice?

Divorce mediation is an effective solution for amicable spouses. However, there are circumstances where it may not be appropriate. Below are common situations where mediation is discouraged.

Significant Power Imbalance Between Spouses

When one partner exerts control or manipulates the other, mediation can reinforce unhealthy dynamics and lead to unfair outcomes.

Refusal to Compromise or Cooperate

When one or both parties refuse to compromise, divorce mediation is not the solution. Successful mediation relies on the willingness of both spouses to be open and find common ground. A divorce mediator cannot help couples who are unwilling to negotiate, as it stalls the process.

Lack of Transparency or Financial Honesty

Transparency is another requirement of successful divorce mediation. A partner who hides financial accounts or another who fears their information will be exposed is not an ideal candidate for mediation. Partners must have full faith that each will approach the process with candor.

Concerns About Domestic Violence or Abuse

In instances where there is a concern about domestic violence or abuse, divorce mediation is not recommended. The safety of each partner is paramount. When participating in divorce mediation unintentionally puts one spouse at risk or endangers them, avoid divorce mediation.

The Benefits of Choosing Divorce Mediation

Divorce mediation is a viable solution for many, as it offers a less adversarial and more cooperative approach to divorce. Divorce mediators encourage partners to collaborate and arrive at an agreement without a judge’s intervention. This gives couples more control over their divorce.

Working with a divorce mediator is less costly in money and time compared to litigation. Private mediation costs vary based on the complexity of the case, but average $3,000 to $8,000. Couples who aim to maintain an amicable relationship for the sake of their children opt for mediation, too.

Let Barber Law Offices Help You Navigate Divorce with Confidence

Divorce mediation may be the right path for couples who are transparent and cooperative. In such cases, Barber Law Offices, LLC, can be of service. Our law firm is staffed with skilled lawyers who serve as divorce mediators and are ready to provide representation when you are approaching divorce.

Our divorce mediators are experienced in helping disputing partners arrive at mutually beneficial agreements. As an objective third-party, we work to resolve issues surrounding division of property, parental responsibilities, child support, alimony, and other matters that arise during the divorce process.

Divorce is often emotionally and financially draining, but mediation can be a less taxing option than going to trial. It’s important to remember that divorce mediation is effective when both parties are willing to compromise. Negotiations are nearly impossible without the participation of each partner.

When you are thinking about divorce and believe mediation would be best, consult the family law attorneys at Barber Law Offices. We serve Schaumburg, Illinois, families with dedication. Call our law offices to find out more about how our divorce mediators can be of service to you and your family.